Financial Peace

Well, here I go, set to truly embark on my journey of Financial Peace University. Wow! Today I sat down to do the real budget. What a great time for the homework to come, right before payday. I was grateful for that as I only get paid once a month, I was excited to get started on this new life.

This truly does involve letting go, but the harsh reality of it is exactly the same as I posed the question to my pastor should I even take this class knowing that I have nothing left at the end of the month, if I even make it. He told me - yes, take the class as you never know what God has in store. Well, now I know in reality what God has to work with.

I admit that as I set to do this budget, I stopped and prayed, asking God to be with me and to help me be a good steward of His money for His glory. I also admit that when I was finally done doing this task, at least 1 1/2 hours later, I was near tears, but I said no, I will not cry because God is in control. I prayed again and then I called my accountability partners. I am so blessed to have a wonderful married couple who is going to be with me through this.

It was funny as I posed a question to her, she said "let me go to the other room and put you on speaker phone so you can ask him" and they both agreed that God was speaking to them as they both gave me the same answer. Hey, I guess God knows I am trying. I still kind of feel like crying though. One thing that looking at myself on paper as far as a budget goes is the fact that if my daughter's father even gave just a little child support for her, it would make a huge difference. This assignment made me hurt again, mad, and excited for what God will be doing, all at the same time.

I admit that even though there really is not much for us to "play" with, not much wiggle room at all, there is a certain sense of peace that no matter what, we are going to survive from day to day and we don't have to fear that. Dave Ramsey says it takes 91 days to adjust to this new way of financial living. I am going to do that 91 days and more. How exciting to be showing my daughter this legacy. It's right there in black and white. She can see the error of debt in the first place, as although I don't have much, I have some and if I didn't we would have much more "wiggle room". She can learn how to manage her money and she can learn to trust God.

Maybe I need to cry, because realizing what a wonderful thing I am doing for my daughter is touching my heart even more than realizing the reality of my fiancial situation did. Funny, and I'm not even PMS'ing. Must totally be a God thing. Praise the Lord for softening hearts.

My daughter is named Gloria. My husband named her before she was even conceived telling me when we met that we were going to get married and have a daughter and name her Gloria because everything that is good in the life is the Gloria. I ask you to join me in prayer that God place some of the memory of how he wanted and created this child so that maybe, just maybe his heart will be softened to financially support this girl, who is very good and who does not deserve anything other than to at least be cared about a little by her father.

Hallelujah!